children and family, Humor, Uncategorized

Raising the Kids

You would think that the 5 minutes in the morning that you spend in the rest room are totally yours. That is an assumption! Ha!

Are you a mother to more than one child? If you are then my friend, you can relate to what I am saying. For some reason, dads don’t get it. After all, the kids never bother their dads in the restroom. Well that’s my assumption.

Every morning I get up, I have this list of chores to accomplish before I can have my restful “quiet” time in my space, that is the rest room (well it used to be). You would argue that I should get 5 minutes early in that case. My argument : why? I am an equal human and I totally love stealing my extra 5 minutes in the blanket in my warm spot when the kids are still asleep. The sweet extra 5 minutes, which is a self delusion that i can squeeze in my 7-8 hrs “required” sleep in those 5 minutes ( you must be kidding. Name one mother of a toddler who gets the required sleep of 7-8 hrs). Anyways, I can have thousand reasons/excuses of why I can’t get 7-8 hrs sleep.

I have a 9 years old and a 2&1/2 years old. They are 6&1/2 years apart. You would think, wow…great..what a difference..you have the older child as a helper and the younger one will grow up looking up-to the older one.

Well, you must be really naive!!… Don’t you think the older one has “better things” to do than being a helper for her own sister…like homework, projects, watching TV, playing games..It’s not her fault if the parents decided to have the second one when she was 6.

What….did you say that at least the second one must be in the awe of the older one??.. You certainly have no idea. Do you have children? I mean the types where one is “older” than the other and the other is “younger” than the other. Confused? Don’t be…it’s just the beginning..that’s what I
am told….at this point, my mother’s favorite phrase is ringing in my ears, ” wait till you have your own kids“. Anyways….the little one does look up-to the older one but for the catchy phrases and new clap and flap songs she brings home from school.

Every morning, I drop off my older one to the school. We leave from home at 8:45 am so that we can be at the school at 8:50 am for 8:55 am bell. You want to know my stress level between 8:40 am and 8:45 am?

Those 5 minutes…where I start warning the little one to put the TV off (oh come on, admit it, we all let the little ones watch TV so that we can get the older ones ready for school); another warning to the older one to get the backpack ready, check the special for the day, pick up the bottle, make sure lunch is there (the older one is a dreamer, floating around at her own pace while my boiling pressure “on the nerves” is about to blow off).

I still have to use the restroom since I had been busy from the moment I got up doing this and doing that (we all have the list in the morning). Well there is still 2 minutes to 8:45 am. I can have my 2 minutes. I go to the restroom and the click “my time” starts, I hear chaos…right outside my door.

You want to know what :
The older one : mom, she called me funny stupid (referring to my toddler).
The little one : mom, sister called me silly poo poo (literally).
The older one : mom she kicked me on my leg
The little one : mom sister tellin lies
The older one : mom she did
The little one : mom I did not…
OH MY GOD…..that’s my reaction…trying to cover up my ears, pretending that I didn’t hear anything…with my eyes rolled to the back of my head..
Well this is a routine…don’t I love my kids..

I come out, still constipated since the chaos did its charm…grrrrd at both of them. Put them in my SUV, while they are still arguing…I put on “Radio Disney” to call it quits (they love the channel on radio). Coco Jones is singing, “holla at the DJ”. The older one says…my favorite song…the little one interrupts ….cuze (excuse me in a toddler’s vocabulary).. It’s my favorite not yours..and there they go again. I stop the car at the school side curb to drop my older. The little one starts the good bye ritual : bye sister…have fun sister…stay safe sister..love you too..miss you…..(she has mugged up all the bye bye rituals in our family).

Did anybody say anytime,” it takes a village to raise a kid”. LIAR!!

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